Lessons in grief

Chris's grandpa passed away on Tuesday evening. It was expected, and there was at least some relief for those closest to him that the tension, the waiting was over. He was gone, it was final. He was a good and great man, and I love him.

Grandpa Wheeler was diagnosed with ALS, also known as Lou Gherig's disease a few weeks ago. One night last week, Chris said something like, "I hope I don't catch it [ALS]." I told him don't be so morbid, don't talk like that please. He answered, "Is it okay if I am? It helps me deal with it."

It was an important learning moment for me. Chris has always been a humorous, sometimes cynnical person who likes to make jokes, even at times that some (namely, his wife) would deem "inappropriate." I'd never thought of it as a coping mechanism. I'm glad he was able to help me see.

Not all of us shed tears that can be wiped away.